Connie Ruth Christiansen

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July 1, 2016

Lies That Used to be Truth

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July 3, 2016

Lies That Used to be Truth

 by Connie Ruth Christiansen


(My former friends procrastination, denial, and avoidance, and I learned a lesson from a mattress today).

Today was one of “those” days. I awoke exhausted as if I had not slept, to an upset tummy, and to the return of an annoying problem….you know the one; the problem that stays away until the most inconvenient of moments, until a day when you have a whole list of fun and other busyness planned….my back was out of whack, and painful!

I was lying in bed trying to decide should I stay in bed and nurse the pain, or should I take a chance that it would not be worsened if I get up and start moving around. And I was contemplating a dream from the night before.

The dream was one of “those” dreams; not just a dream, but there was a message in it…..clearly reminding me that I am still carrying around some of those lies that used to be truth. The truth-lies; the methods of coping that worked for me as a child; that even protected my childlike mind and emotions while I was unable to face adult kinds of trouble. And those truth-lies, that should be gone by now, I have been working on them for so long……but here is another one, or another layer, that is hindering me from moving forward to the next good thing in my life.

After a few moments of contemplation, it suddenly seemed like too much work to deal with my dream-revelation…. And so I chose a truth-lie that used to work very well for me in childhood – AVOIDANCE! And in order for that to be effective, I would add to it PROCRASTINATION.

 

It was decided! I would rest; I would stay in bed and nurse my painful back and upset tummy, I would cuddle up with avoidance and procrastination, and we would watch a movie.

Suddenly KERTHUNK!!; there was joltingly loud noise, and the head of my bed shifted slightly….. “what was that?” I wondered out loud. I waited a few moments. Nothing else happened. I had a gut feeling my mattress was about to hit the ground, but instead of climbing out of bed to check, I chose another truth-lie: DENIAL! “It will be ok” I told myself. Avoidance was happy with that. And procrastination assured me that tomorrow would be a better day to look under the bed.

I snuggled up to my truth-lies, and pulled the covers up around me; I reached across the bed to the dresser for the remote control. KERTHUNK! THUNK, THUNKAA! And the head of my bed and my already sore back landed on the floor….”ow!”

I climbed gingerly out from under the covers to look under the bed. The slats that held up the mattress were in shreds. Not just broken, but in splintered shreds!


I sat on the floor feeling the pain of my back and nauseated from my tummy ache; wanting to cry; wanting to feel sorry for myself…..but I could not. The splintered slats under the bed were exactly what I needed!

I suddenly recalled where the slats had come from:

A few years back, I needed new slats for a new mattress – For some reason, I could not find the old slats – the metal frame was there…but where were those slats? I was anxious and happy to try out my new mattress, and so I decided, instead of taking the money and time to go out and buy new slats, that I would find something suitable, temporary, in my parent’s basement...I would go to the store later.

I found some old pieces of wood that were part of a project, built by my father many years before. The project had been lovely, and had served a purpose for a very long time. Once that purpose was no longer in existence, the wood had been stored away. I pulled the project apart; feeling a little bit guilty about dismantling something my father had worked so hard to finish. I chose a few pieces, and then quickly glued and nailed them back together to form a makeshift mattress foundation. I was happy with my accomplishment – the very old wood seemed solid and sturdy and it wasn’t long before the mattress was put in place….and I forgot all about my plans to someday shop for new slats.

I did not notice it happening, since it was beneath the mattress, but over the next few years, the old wood lost strength. It was wasting away, and splintering. And then one day; today, it suddenly could no longer hold the weight of the mattress; could no longer hold me up…..and kerthunk!

There are truths in this life that are like the metal frame those slats were straddled upon; they are like stone – they are unchanged by anything we pile on top of them; they stand the test of time; they always have been, and always will be strong enough to hold us up.

And then there are the truth-lies; the wood slats of our lives that may temporarily give us support, but they do not hold us for long.

And so today, I make a choice. To discard some old wood from the foundation of my life; truth-lies that once served me well as a shaky temporary footing, but will surely eventually give way and send me toppling down if left in place.

And I will trust the truth-stones.

There is so much more to be discovered about this story, but I will start here:


I will compare what I am attempting to change, to these three truth-stones: Faith, Hope, Love.

If it is not about Love, it will be discarded
If it is not about Hope, it will be discarded
If it is not about Faith, it will be discarded

“These three (truth-stones) will last forever,: faith, hope, love; but the greatest of these is love” ~ I Corinthians 13:13

~      Connie Ruth Christiansen, July 1 2016

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